Happy Halloweencoming 2004

This week was JMU's Homecoming along with Halloween, and boy I must say that this bloody nose was well worth it. (I have freakish sporadic cases of blood runneth out of my nose, there's no telling when it will happen but when it does, I normally do not embrace it but since it was a great weekend I decided to let it run its course.)

Sam and his Army buddy Wild came up to spend the weekend up here and sleep on my couches. Saturday morning, we headed over to the usual 1589 for kegs and eggs at 9:30 am. Highlights included Ryan's and my victory over the alum for the beer pong Alumni grudge match in which we whooped Geoff Baio's and Jeff Loftus' sorry little asses and made them wish they never were born, let alone graduate college a long fucking time ago, and then some other events that happened that should be mentioned as highlights because I started this sentence with a plural and I only wrote one.

After ingesting cinnamon rolls, pancakes, homecoming bagels, fucking eggs, cupcakes, cookies, lots of beer, and getting moneyshots in the mouth with the Super Beer Soaker, James packed up the Elantra to head to the stadium where the JMU Dukes played the fake miltary VMI flamefaces. Keep in mind that James was the only sober being in the car, while everyone else screamed out the window at innocent passerbys. Highlights include Sam borrowing EBIII's baseball cap and then letting it fly out the window on the highway, and us getting pulled over by a state trooper on foot. He asked if anybody had been drinking and of course Wild, Sam, and myself forked over our ID's (I felt left out as I do not swallow beer, but merely pull off the drinking and being drunk facade like a champ). The trooper, realizing he had nothing on us, warned Wild that he would get him being drunk in public. Wild snapped back "But, sir, I'm in a car." Trooper mentioned that we were on state property and he could damn well write us up. We all laughed inside ourselves and it was deafening.

Fifty yards down the road, James cranked up the JMU Fight Song and we kept on screaming at innocent little children while the JMU cops gave us thumbs up. Then Wild just went crazy and ambushed every girl possible, clapped in their faces, and sang the fight song at the top of his lungs. Every girl possible, mind you. I think I have heard that damn song more this weekend more times than I listened to Avril's Sk8er boi which I had on loop for three days straight during sophomore year. Sam and Wild were defintely the most school spirited students at the game, whereas they don't even go here, and another non-JMU student Bewalder chimed in with his "Keown, Keown, Keown, YOU SUCK" chants. Our friends rock.

After the game, we came home to eat lard and crash for a few hours before going back out for Round 2 at 9 pm. Twelve intoxicated hours catches up to you before you know it. We went back to 1589 where JMU girls took advantage of the one holiday to dress up as sluts and not be frowned upon, and guys finally had an excuse to walk around in spandex. (Wild was Captain America and his wedgie was far from not being nonexistant.)

Sadly, as I am the King of Costumes (well Danwho has good costumes too, but Ed called me the King of Costumes and he probably told the same thing to Danwho but whatever, I like to feel like a used whore), I did not bother to dress up. Partly due to the fact that I wanted to let all my other friends have the spotlight for once, but mainly due to the fact that I am a lazy noncreative sloth. I also did not take many pictures of people in costumes because I wanted the masses to not get the impression that I did not dress up, but considering the fact that I just told you that I didn't, I did not need to write this sentence but most importantly, you did not need to read it.

Also, as my twin brother Christian proclaimed that because we get an extra hour this weekend with the turning back of the clocks, we are drinking until Wednesday.

Posted October 31, 2004 at 07:57 PM